Thanks everybody

Two days to go in this campaign. Check our Drowning, and if you like it, nominate it.

I owe thanks to a lot of people, and I wanted to give it today. Some people have decided to follow my blog, and I appreciate it. I am slowly building up my readership. If you like what you’ve read, share it. (Warning: you never know what you will get from me.) I also want to thank those of you who have liked my posts. It is nice to be appreciated. Finally, I want to thank all of you who have nominated Drowning in my Kindle Scout campaign.  I don’t know if I will get a publishing contract from it or not, but if I don’t it won’t be because I haven’t had support from many people (over 2,300 actually.) I am going to go ahead and publish it on Kindle even if it doesn’t win a publishing contract. Thank you, everyone, for your support.

For a long time in my life, I have been something of a pessimist, but in my older age, I am trying to see the brighter side of things.  During my struggles with bipolar 2, I have often spent my time wallowing in my own misery rather than focusing on just how blessed I really am.  I don’t want to be one of those people that no one ever wants to be around. Although I am trying to be a better person, I have to admit that the climb has been hard. Many people talk about how they hit bottom before they could climb up.

For a lot of reasons, I hit my bottom last spring, summer, and fall, a period of time when my doctor told me I was having mixed episodes. If you know anything about bipolar disorder, you know these are the worst kinds of episodes you can have. Fortunately, for me, I switched over from one medication to the Lamotrigine I am taking now. For the first time in a while, I can see clearly now, or at least more clearly than I used to. I still have my moments, but I am so much happier than I was.

We have a beautiful day in Poplar Bluff, MO. For now, the sun is shining and the temperature is warm. I did have to do my first lawn mowing of the spring, but I even enjoyed that. We moved to a new home last December, and this was the first time I cut the grass. It really wasn’t that bad, but I wanted to get that first mowing out of the way if for no other reason than to get the layout of the yard. It’s a lot like exploring new territory.

It’s also Easter tomorrow. I’m not your typical Christian because all of my beliefs are not what you would call mainstream but are more in line with the ideals of the Progressive Methodist movement. If you are disillusioned with mainstream Christianity which I have been, you just might find a niche with the progressives. (I know progressive is a dirty word for most conservatives.) I do believe that Christ died and rose as an atonement for our sins. I don’t understand it, but I do believe it.

I want to leave you with a thought, and if you want to, you can tell me whether you agree with it or not. This is a classic (as in old) crossbyte.

A rational thought will never beat a sincere emotion.

It may be dangerous for a bipolar person to say this, but I have always been a believer in “following the gut instinct.”  I’ve always thought of this as kind of a divine guidance.

Until next time, so long.  Have a wonderful Easter, and even if you are not a Christian, take the time to think about how you might resurrect your own life.

I haven't posted in here for a while because I have been using my other blog.

Maybe I could call it a mosaic. What’s going to follow is several somewhat unrelated ideas which might, by working together, give you an idea of what my mindset is right now.

Kindle Scout campaign link

I’ll keep my Kindle Scout report brief. It hasn’t done well the last week and a half, and with five days left, I don’t know if the strong start is going to make a big difference or not.  Usually, the way these work, the last two or three days before the campaign ends there will be a huge influx of views and nominations. I’m hoping there is enough of an influx to influence the Kindle Scout publishers.

Next, I have an important #crossbye

Words are not cheap; the wrong ones will exact a heavy price.

Do you really think about what you say to other people? Do you know that an offhand remark that you throw out to someone without even thinking about it might have the same effect mentally as thrusting a knife right into the middle of someone’s brain?

I remember once when I was in junior high school. Now, they call it middle school. I must confess that I did not look like an athlete, but I was actually good in several sports. I remember playing softball in gym. I made a spectacular catch, a great throw to get a runner out, and I got a big base hit. It even made an impact on the gym teacher who was basically never impacted by anything. When we were in the locker room, he hollered, “Boys, it looks like Cross came to play ball today.” This man never complimented anyone, so I was beaming — for about ten seconds.  Then, another guy, somewhat of a jock, laughed and said, “You think you can get your big head through the door.” Maybe he didn’t mean anything by it, but it humiliated and devastated me.  It would have meant so much to me if he had said, “You did have a good game.” Think about the little offhand remarks you say because they can devastate people.

Let’s see. The weather. It is still gray and rainy — and depressing– in Southeast Missouri. Friday might be good, but I won’t be able to enjoy it because I’ll be busy all day. At least the temperatures have risen.

Easter break officially begins tonight, and I am spending it and probably several more hours later in the weekend grading some papers. I have no one to blame but myself. I retired from teaching, but I just had to work part-time, and what did I do? I went back into the classroom. The papers are not that hard to grade; it’s just having to do them.

I’m reading Stephen King’s Full Dark, No Stars book.  It’s … uh … I’m not quite sure how to describe it (nothing new for Stephen King books). I usually read contemporary young adult problem novels because that’s what I try to write, but I am a little burned out on them. I’m not really going to anything cheerful with Stephen King, but it is different.

I’m a little burned out on writing contemporary young adult problem novels too. I think maybe as I’ve gotten older, I’ve lost touch with a lot of what’s going on with young adults, and I don’t believe I will be writing many more books like Drowning (my Kindle Scout campaign book if you don’t know. They say in a commercial you should mention your product three times if you want people to remember it. I don’t know how I’m going to work in my Kindle Scout campaign novel Drowning for the third time.)

My wife and I have been watching Vera, Murdock Mysteries, and Midsomer Murders on Acorn television and Netflix. I’ve also watched some Cardinal baseball. Other than these, the local news and occasionally Jeopardy, we don’t watch a lot of television. When we are keeping our granddaughter, we do, however, have to endure the Youtube show Little Baby Bum all day.  I don’t know how many times I’ve gone to bed with the little ditty, “If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands …” tumbling through my brain like clothes in a dryer.

I’m still working on my novel Movie Reel: Cut Off, but not really much of anything else. I used to write plays, and I’ve recently had a set of monologues accepted for publication, but I’ve not really done anything for quite a while. I’ve had this idea for a Shakespeare spoof for a long time. I even have a title: The Twelfth Night of the Tempest. I did a mash-up of Hamlet and Romeo and Juliet which I called Haunted Hamlet. This is my most successful play. I also did another one called A Midsummer’s Night Scheme which was kind of a mashup between Julius Caesar and a Midsummer Night’s Dream. It’s been performed a couple of time. A couple of weeks ago, I submitted a couple of plays to a play publisher, and if one or both get published, then I will revisit writing another one.

The vast majority of what I have written is designed for high school audiences — either to read or perform. I think maybe it’s time to look elsewhere.

I think that’s probably enough for one night, so I’m going to call it quits.  Those papers won’t grade themselves.